I have been struggling to write a blog post, but tonight, this is exactly what I want to write about and share.
I do not 100% remember where I exactly heard this phrase before, but I believe this powerful tag line came out of an all-male acapella group that one of my best friends is a part of known as the Yale Spizzwinks(?). (Special shout out to Spizzwinks(?) ! Their words are “We ride. For ride we must”. Also, “Never not go”. These simple, but impactful phrases flooded my mind and soul today as reflected on my summer of 2017 so far. After some events that happened earlier in the year, I made a conscious decision to really take this summer for myself. I want to go into fall and frankly, the rest of my life the strongest I have ever been (mind, body, and soul) so I can be as present as possible with people and the world around me. I was being harsh on myself and was allowing shame to hold me prisoner. Since I was little, I have always been a sensitive, wonder-filled, deep, loving little human of the world. As I got older, there were times when this was not always accepted and my ability to feel and be empathetic seemed more like a curse than a gift. My journey through graduate school made me realize this is a gift (even though sometimes it still is pain in the butt to feel the feels and feel others feels, what the…I mean, really, really?!). This is where “Never not go” comes into play. Big time. I spent a great sum of my earlier years thinking something was wrong with me, but the bottom line is, we as human beings lack nothing. There is nothing wrong, everything we need is already inside. This summer, I have dug back deep into the artsy things I love like music and film. I have spent time with my amazing friends and family creating more memories and sharing both laughs and tears. The gym, a place I once feared, is becoming more and more of sanctuary each time I go. Inside of hating my body, I love feeling how each muscle moves and am inspired by other people who give it their all when they are there. Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit. This is how I want to live my life. “Never not go”. Send the text message, be in the pictures no matter how you look, give big hugs, learn something new, go towards your fears, hold hands, stick together, sing to the songs you love, questions things, challenge yourself, let yourself be moved, use your gifts to help and inspire others, go on both big and small adventures, because guess what? They are all big adventures. Today, I reflected on specific moments that have happened to me so far in my life like looking at snapshots found in an old shoe box. The time I got to hold my grandpa’s hand during some of his final days. The time I got to hug one of my best friend’s goodbye after a fun night out at our favorite bar and saying, “Love you, see you soon” even though we both did not know at the time that would be the last time we saw each other. Laughing till it hurt with college roomates and friends. Family nights with my parents and brother. Hearing that first round of applause being on stage during a show. Feeling my Master’s hood hit my shoulders. First kisses and butterflys. Watching the people I love most support each other and accomplish things. Hugs. How many wonderful, amazing, different people I have gotten to embrace physically and embrace all their beauty as a person who becomes a friend. Never not go. Go. We are here for such a short while, lets write one hell of a story, shall we?
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AuthorMy name is Olivia. I am woman, daughter, sister, friend, and counselor. I just want to put love in the world. Archives
October 2018
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